betterman

today has been quite cool and im again feeling happy and so my nostrils have stopped flaring (phewf). i also feel a bit more settled about the massive changes that are constantly on my mind at the moment pulling my emotions every whichway making me a walking sac of feelings... knowing that you have a security blanket which is strong, secure and has a minky lining that is good to snuggle down under is truely a beautiful eye-opener. today i thought about my closest friends and i am so thankful and gracious and damn lucky to have them in my life; they make me feel like a rich person and i know no matter how shit things seem, there will ALWAYS be a silver lining with them around. they listen to my problems, as little and annoying or big and scary that they seem they will sit with me drinking tea and helping sort things out> not making decisions for me, but helping me see every picture from every possible angle, broadening my mind and allowing me to become a better person, a nicer person and they calm my senses every time. they know the real me and have taken the time out to find out who i am and not dismissed me as the person who they want me to be, who they thought id be or thought they were too cool to know me. to be truely accepted is such a nice feeling and one that doesnt always come about in friendships or your relationships with people and sometimes not even with yourself. i feel sorry for people who dont think they are worth being accepted because they will never experience the this feeling of freedom and knowledge. i am so lucky because after a long journey i realised that im not a bad person and after that realisation i became friends with two of the most genuine girls i have ever known. they are wonderful, beautiful and are a huge part of my world and my being. i also have a few others that i could tell anything to and know that they would still be there for me to help me out.. yesterday, i added someone else to that group of whom i was uncertain i would ever have the chance to rely on or allow myself to rely on and it was very comforting to let them help me because i really needed a hand and they were like a refreshing glass of cordial on the situation.
9 days until we go and i finally feel prepared to take the plunge> take a chance :)

ps listen to betterman by john butler trio and tiny dancer (any version)
these were the songs i listened to whilst writing this blog and those two songs make feel so good!
ps WARNING: betterman can make you sad if your in a bit of a sadsy mood or if you listen to the lyrics and your going through something similar....

pps if your trying to impress someone you think is sexy NEVER call them a HAZARD or call them DANGEROUS...ive made both of these mistakes, one of the guys i said this to was a mistake too HAHAHAHAHA his rossi boots did things to me though even though he was rather obese but the other one is still sexy and i dont think he thinks im a total douche, however, it is very risky and you may not make it through the conversation with 1) exchanged phone numbers, 2) a kiss, 3) you may not get to finish the conversation in the first place cause they might just turn and walk away (the first dude, though i like to think we just got pulled apart by the massive uni crowds :S)

ppps in total difference to the pps above, dont take dating advice from me cause in my own way i am very bad at getting boys attention and whenever i try to be sexy or alluring things happen such as my skirt falling off, i hit myself in the head with things (accidently! geez), i lose my ability to talk, i turn into a cougar, i fall over or trip myself with my feet, i got excited by rossi boots and a hairy mole, my last boyfriend was about 80 with huge sunnies and a walking stick (he wasnt really but he was my fake one!), i have an over-fondness for fake moustaches and its probably in your best intentions to do your own thing and just be confident in yourself....